Single and OK

It wasn’t until the day someone asked me why I was still single and what would probably be the negative traits that I carried that I forced myself to reason out and look within.

Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now, for me, it means that I’m smart for taking my time deciding how I want my life to be instead of settling for just anyone to spend it with. Not only that, but also recognizing what’s meant for me is the only way to get it to come for me. 

Learning to be happy alone doesn’t just benefit you when you are alone, it allows you to approach relationships from a place of confidence. I used to be so afraid of losing people, until I realized most of them were never really down for me in the first place. Even though my loyalty and love for them ran deep, they could care less. They probably loved the love I showered them with, but I never got the same love back. So instead of being afraid of losing them, I watched them lose me. I just didn’t have it in me anymore to be the person who followed behind people every time they decided to leave. Also, it shouldn’t have to take me leaving for them to see that I was worth keeping. 

So the answer to why I am single is: I am still single because when I love, I love wholeheartedly and when I love someone genuinely and wholeheartedly I give them my all and I care for them as much as I care for myself. I’m single because obviously I’m the only one who tries, who goes out of their way and above and beyond to make things work. And until the day I cross paths with someone who truly appreciates my ride or die kind of love, who keeps their word, who goes all in, who gives it their all and is willing to add to my happiness instead of taking it away I will be on my own and, believe me, OK with that.